Sixth Meditation

I had my sixth session much earlier than usual today. I can say that before coffee and breakfast that my mind is quieter, if not a little sleepy. But it was allot easier to keep my mind's eye focused on my inner triangle of balance. I will probably continue to use that image as my focus since I do closed eye meditations anyway. I think the whole point of focusing on an outside object was originally for focus on a religious article. Since I don't ascribe to a certian religion - and if I did it would be pointless still because I would be Christian and that would mean for me the sin of idolatry- I don't have a huge motivation to bring in an object outside my mind making it that much harder to focus on whats inside. That's what I think about the whole focus on an object thing. Plus I'm finding the mental aspect to be quite powerful. I feel that by turning my gaze inward and quiting my mind I am able to get a clearer glimpse of my limitless, inward potential. I feel more powerful today, indeed.

Chapter Three

Chapter 3

If you overesteem great men, people become powerless.

If you overvalue possessions, people begin to steal.

The Master leads by emptying people's minds

and filling their cores,by weakening their ambition

and toughening their resolve.

He helps people lose everything they know,

everything they desire,and creates confusion

in those who think that they know.

Practice not-doing,

and everything will fall into place.

Another re-iteration of the first and second universal paradoxes. You must first become a fool in order to become wise. You must first loose control in order to be the master. You must practive not-doing in order to get things done. Be one with your own destiny. Be agressive in mastering yourself, your strengths and weaknesses. Be humble enough to relquinsh your standing time and agian in order to acknowledge you do NOT have it figured out yet. This is how you become wise. Knowing your own foolishness and limites allows you to become wise and powerful indeed.

Chapter Thirty-Six

Chapter 36

If you want to shrink something,you must first allow it to expand.

If you want to get rid of something,you must first allow it to flourish.

If you want to take something,you must first allow it to be given.

This is called the subtle perceptionof the way things are.

The soft overcomes the hard.

The slow overcomes the fast

Let your workings remain a mystery.

Just show people the results

He we are now at the "Second Universal Paradox" agian. That's what I'll call it. It's that one I've written about in previous post. This is the paradox of"Doing without trying". It's the way of the master. Remember YOU are the master (of mistress). By relequinshing control (or attempt to control) of things one is able to truly be in control of his own life. This chapter echos to me whispers of the Apostle Paul who lived much later than our man Lu but carried in him a similar mysterious charisma. Let's face it- Paul was an oratory bad-ass. Here's the passaage of Paul's that Lu often reminds me of when speaking about what I call the "First Universal Paradox":

18"Let no man deceive himself . If any man among you thinks that he is wise in this age, he must become foolish, so that he may become wise. 19For he wisdom of this world is foolishness before God For it is written, "He is The One who catches the wise in their craftiness"; 20and again, "The Lord knows the reasonings of of the wise, that they are useless." 21So then let no one boast in men for all things belong to you." 1 Corinthians 3 (New American Standard Bible)

I'm also reminded of the time Jesus told the parable of the tares and the wheat. He said to let the tares grow along with the wheat, to be patient, and one day they would grow up and everyone could clearly see the difference. Then is would be easy to destory to unwatned intruding plants. I think he was getting at a simliar meaning as Lu's line: "If you want to get rid of something,you must first allow it to flourish." I hear Lu saying that in order to get what you want out of life you must pace your self, be patient, and look at things differently. Know that the entire universe was set into motion long before you ever existed and will continue on long after you're gone. Stop trying to control it and pay closer attention to the things in your life that are your responsibility. Know what true force is and how it is applied to a goal in order to accompolish it. When Lu says: "The soft overcomes the hard." think of water. How a cup of it can't even hurt your expensive silk blouse but tidal waves can destory whole cities. Glaciers can sink ships, and shelter the mighty polar bear. Rapid rivers can erode away huge canyons. That's the type of power he is alluding to here.

When Lu says: "The slow overcomes the fast" think of how the earth's crust move and change the shaps of geological structures over time. Think of how enormous stalagtites and stalagmites grow by just one drop of liquid at a time. After a while they overcome faster moving substances like gases. Air can't evaporate them anymore because they have solidyfied from all those tiny drops into something hard and unmovable. Don't compare your progress to others. You will overcome. You will accompolish. You will reach your goal. Deligience is the discipline praised here. Be consistent and focused in all you do and nothing can stop you.

I hope I have made the Second Universal Paradox clear. I will continue to draw off of it and off of Paul's paradox which I will refer to as the "First Universal Paradox" because I beleive you must first become foolish, you must first acknowledge to desparing limited of your present state of understanding before you can be opened up to learn and truly become wise. Then the second universal paradox can be employed, helping you master your own devices, talents, and challanges.

Belief.Net

A dear friend of mine referred me to this website today. Here is the link. It's a survey that helps one compute what religion their personal beliefs match.
http://www.beliefnet.com/Entertainment/Quizzes/BeliefOMatic.aspx

I will post my result later when I have completed the quiz myself. My internet connection is too lazy right now for me to have the patience for it. But I urge you to go on and try it. Comment below what you learn about yourself. I would love to read it.

Fith Meditation

This morning I can say was my most successful meditation session yet. I set my timer for 20 minutes which passed before I knew it and I went on for 5 more . I focused my mind's eye on the triangle again. I drew in my breath and breathed out the moment. And somehow in the midst of all this I found these words running through my mind, they are from a band I used to listen to years ago:

"King or cripple; what have I become?

Beneath these kingly robes their lies a fragile man.

What made me a king can sometimes cripple.

All that you give can sometimes rob my innocence.

Why do you let us walk along a cliff so steep?

When deep below the sea there lies a bed of gold?

And if this should be our battle ground,

don't let me fall; don't let us fall. "

(from King Or Cripple by Smith, Martin of Delirious?)

My soul remembers and can't forget. God is inside.

I've long ago asked Him to help me leave behind all that is of man. Now it's time to embrace who He really is. Really is? Who really is our Creator? Anyone who seriously wants to know God, I believe, should at least have the guts to ask Him straight out without going through another man's opinion and doctrine. Because, I believe, there are many facets to the Creator and maybe my (and maybe yours too) connection with Him is needed to help make up a more complete human understanding of who and what God is. I'm not saying that theology should not be drawn upon to gain insight into who God is but I am saying that I've already had enough theology to last me a lifetime. Now it's time for me to continue in my own theology and discover for myself just what is this Creator all about. Hence the inception of this blog. I'm putting down here in words (Or I am attempting to) the chronicles of my soul's journey toward this understanding. It's a rediscovery or sorts. A new oddessy of spirit that I have embarked on and I'm never looking back. You're welcome, dear pilgrim, to join me.

Fourth Meditation

Today I positioned myself with back against the wall. (No creeps today.) I had to begin by sitting in the lotus position and dangling an orange poof from a string. (My little Gentleman caller insisted I needed to amuse him a moment.) Soon I was focusing on my breathing. Do you know how hard it is to coordinate rhythmic breathing, pushing out thoughts, and focusing on one aesthetic thing ALL at once? This breathing thing is pretty tough. Don't get me wrong- I didn't just make the blondest statement of the year. I mean getting into the habit deep breathing that starts in your belly and rises in your chest is quite a coordinating feat in itself. Unless you are already of a singing disposition or a hard-core yoga buff. Anyways, this I must work on before a habit of meditation can solidify.
Today I chose the focal point of sapphire beads and surrendering to the waves of a likewise colored, limitless ocean. I don't have expertise in this matter but I suspect there is subliminal significance to what your mind choosing to visualize at times of meditation. I will have to look into it. I largely held a visualization, one which is becoming a regular appearance before my mind's eye, of a blue triangle with purple rays uniting my mind, spirit, and body (or as the lotus position simulates the unity and balance if your physical and metaphysical members.) One unifying triangle of the mind, spirit and body- this was a strong picture that held all other thoughts at bay and even made a quite enough respite for me to think on my personal balance and unity, how powerful they are combined. I was able to recall my mind back to the place I described yesterday, one of strange personal awareness that plays with my sense of depth, but only briefly.
I finished rather abruptly though for I was not able to completely get my mind off of all the things about my life I am rather anxious about at the present. I will continue to hammer away at the build-up of mental gunk on my conscious though, and forge for my mind and new mental superhighway, a conduit of change in my life.

Third Meditation

Today I meditated in late afternoon in front of the back door facing a huge pile of snow which I used to reign in my thoughts. Thinking on snow can lea to adll sorts of metaphors I realized. I went from thinking about solid purity, to the false purity of snow, (it looks clean but it's actually made up of ice and dirt) to the blood of Christ that washes whiter than snow.
My mind ventured to a place of fullness in its awareness of my conscious and physical self. I have been to this place before, I realized. I think it deserves further exploration. It's a sort of strange sensation that plays with my sense of depth. It lends a keen since of the present. I was pleased to reach such a place only about ten minutes into my session but it also sort of hindered me a bit because such a dynamic state of being in the present makes me really sense where I am- that I am me, in my chair, sitting, in this room, alone and very venerable. I kept visualizing myself from behind and it gave me the creeps. I made extra effort to keep my thoughts on what was in front of me.
Because I didn't get started to about 4:45pm I knew I was pushing my luck with solitude. My sister usually gets home some time after five pm. I only needed about 20 minutes so I decided to go ahead with it and try not to let the thought of her possibly coming home before I was finished distract me too much. I did reign my thoughts in pretty well anyway, considering but she did come in the front door before I was finished. I thought the interruption would be an abrasive jolt but really, since I was half expecting it, wasn't. Since the back door is aligned with the front I was the first thing she saw when entering and the moment went from serenity to laughter when she said "Are you in time out?" So I told her no, that I was just meditating and slowly began to stretch and get up from my chair.
I think it went very well today. I even had an unexpected pleasant finish after all. Before I stood up from the chair I stretched my upper body, arching my back and experienced a heavy blood rush through my whole body all the way to my brain. (Maybe I wasn't breathing deeply enough?) But I stayed seated so I wouldn't pass-out on the floor and the effect was quite euphoric. Don't know if that is an often desired consequence of meditation but it felt serenely in keeping with the whole intended mind frame so I went with it.